Stress, Stress Management and Self-Care
Intro
We all have dreams, goal and ambitions. However, too much stress can stop us in our tracks! It is important to keep our stress levels at a manageable level. Why? Because feeling too much stress limits our ability to perform and work towards our goals.
Are you feeling stressed? Are your work hours too long or your commute too stressful? Are the expectations of those around you overwhelming? Are your own expectations of yourself causing you stress?
Most of us are over-stressed – at least to some degree. It seems to be just part of life these days.
If you are experiencing too much stress and it is taking a toll on you, then this is for you.
The effects of too much stress
If stress didn’t take a toll on us, we could just ignore it. But it does affect us – physically, behaviorally, emotionally and cognitively.
Too much stress can result in cognitive effects (e.g., reduced attention, inability to concentrate), physical effects (e.g., headache, fatigue, hypertension), emotional effects (e.g. irritability, anxiety, depression) and behavioral effects (e.g., angry outbursts, overeating).
If stress has all these negative impacts – which it does – then it is worth taking a little time to begin to understand where it is coming from – the source!
Determining the source of any problem is the first step in being able to address it effectively. It is the starting point for finding better coping strategies, which in turn can help us protect our health and well-being. This can lead to a breakthrough for you on your way to experiencing life better and enjoying your life more fully.
Learning both the source of and ways to reduce stress (or at least cope with it in a healthy manner) can be quite empowering. In fact, just feeling empowered will likely lower your stress.
What is stress?
It is a normal psychological and physical response to the demands of life. Excessive stress is the result of these demands (either external or internal) exceeding our capacity to cope with them. If you are familiar with the “fight or flight” response, you know what I am talking about.
Where does stress come from?
There are many sources of stress in this fast-paced world that we live in. Stress can originate from your environment (external) or from your own physiology or emotional state (internal).
External demands are everywhere! They can be job related, money related, or family related. Perhaps everything is fine, but you just need a vacation! Everyone needs some time away.
Some examples of external causes are…
- The daily grind (e.g., job demands, traffic, a long To Do list)
- A major change in your life (e.g., marriage or divorce, a birth or death, a job change, moving,…).
Internal demands may be related to illness, trauma, pain or a host of other possibilities. Good health really is something to be grateful for!
Some examples of internal causes are…
- Sensory sensitivities
- Illness or trauma
- Uncertainty
What can you do about stress?
If you can pinpoint the source of your stress, you can begin to address it.
If you stress is originating from how you are living your life or spending your time, address it directly with lifestyle adjustments.
For example, if poor diet is to blame, change your eating habits. If you are too sedentary, increase your physical activity. If you are wanting to spend more time with friends or family, make that a priority.
If the source is something that you cannot change, try to find a way to minimize its impact on you. Direct accommodations may be the best bet.
For example, if too much sunlight gives you a headache, you could limit your time in the sun. Or perhaps a good pair of sunglasses and a sunhat would be sufficient.
If you can’t change it and can’t find a way to minimize its impact, you may still be able to minimize your overall feelings of stress. There are numerous stress management techniques. Here are just a few.
- Relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, meditation or yoga
- Go for a walk or simply spend time outdoors.
- Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT)
- HeartMath Coherence Training
If the stressor is something you simply cannot avoid, then these strategies could possibly give you more resilience.
However, if you are SO stressed (like I was at one time) that just thinking about adding some new strategy is overwhelming, then consider taking something OFF your plate instead. Free up some time to relax or enjoy a favorite activity.
Emotions and stress
Also, remember that your emotions play a contributing role towards stress. We can stress ourselves by trying to “do it all” – or thinking that we should be perfect or have everything under control all the time.
Fear, worry and overwhelm increase your stress, while joy, love, kindness and appreciation decrease your stress. It is practically impossible to feel positive and negative feelings at the same time. One will dominate and will significantly impact your stress levels – for good or bad.
It makes sense, then, that an activity that makes you feel good will not only increase your sense of well-being, but also help keep your stress in check.
So, if you like to paint, paint. If you like to garden, garden. If you like to run, run. Take time to do something fun!
A word about self-care
We hear a lot about self-care these days and for good reason. Besides being just plain good for you, self-care can be a big part of your strategy to manage stress.
Exercise, quiet time or meditation, yoga, yes, even self-indulgences can all have a beneficial effect on your overall well-being.
Rest & unplug!
Stressed or not, rest is something that we all need. Sunday is known as the day of rest – but don’t wait until Sunday!
Give yourself frequent breaks and sprinkle in self-care throughout your week. Sometimes this means unplugging from social media and all our “screens” as well.
Unplugging from the daily grind also gives us time for creative thinking and new perspectives.
While determination is good for some things, if you are feeling overly stressed, perhaps the opposite would be good for just a bit. Give yourself a break!
Go easy on yourself if you are feeling stressed. The last thing you need is more stress from too high expectations of yourself. If you need to rest, rest. You’ll feel better and do better when rested.
Don’t stress yourself over being stressed. Keep things simple!
Choose just ONE thing that you can do (or discontinue doing) to minimize your stress. If all you have the stamina for at the moment is to take a break, then do that. If you can make lifestyle adjustments, that’ll pay off in the long run. Start where you are.
Final words of encouragement
Just know that it is worthwhile. Keeping your stress in check can help you thrive.
Effective stress management makes us more resilient in the face of everyday challenges.
And finally, if stress is taking a toll on your health, it may be time to see your doctor.
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Here are some suggested resources for further reading:
Stress Management: Stress Basics (at the Mayo Clinic website)
https://www.mayoclinic.org/…/bas…/stress-basics/hlv-20049495
Stress: Physiological and Behavioral Responses (Q&A quizlet originating from Vanderbilt University School of Nursing) at
https://quizlet.com/…/stress-physiological-and-behavioral-…/
Transforming Stress: The HeartMath Solution for Relieving Worry, Fatigue, and Tension (2005) by Doc Childre and Deborah Rozman, PhD. (Published by New Harbinger Publications, Inc.)
Q: In what ways does stress limit your activities, productivity or enjoyment?
Q: Can you identify the source(s)? Can you make a change to minimize the impact?
Q: What do you like to do just for you? What are your favorite self-care indulgences?